Sherlock is not ready to be in a relationship with Molly yet

 (Sherlock meta by cogentranting)

Q: But I don’t want Sherlock for Molly, brave wonderful Molly. She makes him better, so much better, but he doesn’t do the same for her. And she deserves that. She deserves more than crumbs from a table, even Sherlock’s table. She deserves a feast.

A: That’s fair. Molly does deserve the best. But for better or worse, Sherlock is the one who Molly loves. For as long as we’ve seen her it’s never been anyone else. And I think it’s a lot like what they said about John marrying an assassin- it’s what she likes. Sweet, brave, kind Molly, loves Sherlock. Sherlock who’s brilliant, proud, egotistical, thoughtless, devoted, passionate, loyal, fiercely protective, patient, good with kids, a dragon slayer for the weak and the outcasts. For better or worse, this is who Molly loves with her incredible steady, unconditional love. And, at least for this time in her life, she’s not going to love someone else so there can’t be someone better.

But don’t I think it’s fair to describe it as “crumbs from a table”. It’s not that. That implies that what Sherlock has to give he’s withholding. And he’s not. He may not have a feast for her but he’s raided his kitchen and put out the best he’s got. It’s just that this is Sherlock, coming from years and years of repressed trauma, denying his emotions and convincing himself he’s a sociopath. So he doesn’t have that much to offer, but what he has he’s giving.

He does make her better in some ways. He tells her how important she is. How much she matters. He respects her as someone to keep him in line and help him behave and as an expert in her field. And through this he helps her realize her own worth. I think that it’s through dealing with Sherlock that Molly learned to push back, to stand up for herself, to not let anyone toy with her. I think Sherlock showed Molly how to be strong and to know her own value and to stand firm against the naysayers. It’s not as much as she’s given him but it’s a start.

And so that’s part of why I think he’s not ready yet. He’s not ready to be in a real relationship with someone. Probably wasn’t even ready to bring those feelings out into the open. But he’s healing and he’s growing and learning how to love and be loved. And so I think, for now, it’s just about acknowledgment of both their feelings, and I think that’s really valuable. But I think Molly does deserve better and that they just need time to let Sherlock grow to be better.