She can’t sit there 

 (Sherlock Meta by sherlockmeta, fkef.tumblr and theleftpill)

sherlockmeta:

So, I haven’t seen anyone mention that in His Last Vow, when John sees that Sherlock has moved his chair–doesn’t it seem like that was another adjustment Sherlock had made as part of his ruse relationship with Janine?

He went to all the trouble to allow her into his living area, and let her be physically close to him (to an extent)…but the one thing he couldn’t bear was to have her sitting in John’s chair. Because moving it to his own bedroom wouldn’t have kept it out of Janine’s way, I assume he carried it all the way upstairs to John’s old bedroom, to ensure it wouldn’t be violated. Lugging a bulky armchair up a staircase, by himself…quite a bit of effort to go to, and not the type of thing I see Sherlock doing if he’s simply trying to cut John’s place out of the flat in retaliation for his marriage.

No. His relationship with Janine was an elaborate performance, requiring sacrifices of his personal comfort in order to play the role to the hilt…but he was, in the end, unable to countenance the thought of allowing Janine to sit across from him, in the space that was rightfully John’s. And as soon as he’d got Janine out of the way, he immediately brought the chair back…

theleftpill:

It’s possible that this was Sherlock’s motivation, but by making Janine the reason he lost the chair and her absence the reason he brought it back, you lose not only a pretty big plot point but also the stronger symbolism connected to John’s absence and return.

John’s missing chair is a lovely physical, non-verbal, passive-aggressive, pity-party tantrum of a metaphor. Sherlock Removed The Chair. And then he didn’t re-arrange the furniture to balance out the room, he didn’t shift things around to better utilize his living space; he left a huge gaping hole in the middle of the floor. One you can’t possibly hope to miss. And when called on it, he gives such a lovely bullshit response. The removal is used as another metaphor for Sherlock’s inability to cope with John’s absence.

The chair returns to signal John’s “beginning of the end” of his trust in Mary. It’s Sherlock’s way to break the news gently to John that he’s soon to move back in, along with the perfume bottle working as the clue as to why. The chair’s return communicates that Sherlock is prepared to take John back, that John is welcome back, and neither of them have to discuss it. The trust and support is inherent and explicit. You know how these men hate to directly address all this touchy-feely stuff. It works beautifully.

If Janine is Sherlock’s motivation for losing the chair, you lose all of that metaphor. It’s not gone because of Sherlock’s pain; it doesn’t return because of Mary’s betrayal; it comes and goes because of the presence of this woman (whom Sherlock invited into his home, as the OP points out.) The chair then signifies John only peripherally. Janine also is made into a stronger force than John. Sherlock can cope with the empty chair: “Yes the chair brings fond/painful memories, but I can experience them and move on.” But put Janine in it: “But when this harpy comes in and tries to sit down well we need to put a stop to that. Sore feet is what she deserves.” This idea raises Janine’s emotional importance to Sherlock above John’s, and that’s just not this show.

It further reduces the gesture to an act of hostility towards a woman he’s using for a purpose. Sherlock is rarely (ever?) hostile without a reason - either manipulation to get what he wants or emotional retaliation. He has no reason to be vicious to Janine; she’s there because he wants her to be and he genuinely likes her. The chair’s return furthers the petty motivation and discards its use to forward the plot; it wasn’t there to tell John gently that he’s soon to move back in, it was already there for some other reason and John sat in it out of habit.

Sherlock’s inability to bear Janine in John’s chair can’t be the reason Sherlock lost it, if you want to keep the symbolism of the loss of John and how it works in the plot. It is a nice headcanon layer though.

And don’t forget that if she doesn’t have a chair to sit in, then she’s forced to sit in Sherlock’s lap. And that’s a bonus he probably didn’t mind having.

fkef:

I always find it incredibly interesting that people forget that Sherlock used Janine. And didn’t let her know what was up. Because he didn’t trust her. No, he didn’t like her. We saw his fake smile fall as soon as she left the apartment. Do we just all see Sherlock let a woman sit in his lap and all go, [OMG Sherlock in love]?

Jesus christ. I don’t think Sherlock liked her. He knew from the start that she was of use to him, and so he carefully nurtured that relationship. If Sherlock knew of Mary’s ex-boyfriend before meeting him, what makes you think he didn’t know where Janine worked before meeting her?

Sherlock calls himself a high-functioning sociopath (and we see that it’s pretty true until we meet Redbeard), and that means he manipulates people; he uses people. People are means to his ends (which, because he’s on the side of the angels, are “good” according to us).

The chair has nothing to do with Janine and everything to do with John. Janine was simply a key to Magnussen’s office.

theleftpill:

Of course he wasn’t in love with her; he was absolutely manipulating her by staging that “relationship.”  But that doesn’t exclude him liking her.  It’s most succinctly shown in their delicious “So we’re good?  Of course” moment.  That moment is genuine camaraderie; he respects her and enjoys her company.  The Sign of Three is rife with great Sherlock/Janine moments.  I mean jeez, the guy spends the whole day trying to find her a guy she can hook up with.  This is Sherlock; why in the hell would he waste his time like that on someone he doesn’t like?  He confesses his love of dancing to her.  He searches her out to dance with.  Yeah, Sherlock likes Janine.  It’s all in the show.

I don’t think he “knew from the start that she was of use to him.”  Until His Last Vow, Magnussen wasn’t on his radar: it was Lady Smallwood’s request of Sherlock to be a go-between that motivates his cultivation of their “relationship.”  It was a “stroke of luck” that she happened to be the maid of honor (as far as Sherlock knew at the time.)

Sherlock knew about Mary’s ex because he’s seen the guy’s tweets and cropped Facebook pictures, because Sherlock is friends with Mary and he notices these things.  Not because he’s been researching random people in the hopes that they someday might have use in a case.

Sherlock calls himself a sociopath. Sherlock is a crap sociopath. (I have a great gif set idea for this; anyone know how to build those?) We see it’s pretty not true; hugging and kissing Mrs. Hudson, revenging Mrs. Hudson, showing true remorse and apologizing to Molly, do I really need to list the proofs with John to you? Sure he manipulates people.  He also is capable of liking them and having friendly relationships with them. One of the great dichotomies of his character is that he does both at the same time to the same person. Sherlock is a complete shit to the people he loves.  I love that complexity.

So I’m sorry if it upsets you, but Janine is truly and canonically more than simply a key to Magnussen’s office. She caught Sherlock’s attention. She earned his respect. You can’t reduce that richness of character to a mere prop. (Well, you can and did, but that doesn’t make it accurate.)

I’d like to have a discussion... (about Sherlock's sex life)

 (Sherlock meta by sherlollymouse, emmyjeanb, justanotherfangirls, poetattemptsfiction and 

waitingforthemaninthebluebox)

sherlollymouse:

See, I wouldn’t be surprised either way if found out for sure some way that Sherlock and Irene definitely had sex, but, I always lean towards ‘no’ because I think trust is incredibly important to Sherlock and I’m not convinced he trusted Irene.

She played the same types of games with him people all his life did, before John… Remember Sebastian in The Blind Banker? The letter was very friendly, but he even said they hated Sherlock at uni (“Put the wind up everyone, we hated him.”)… but Sherlock still tried to be friendly (calling him Seb) and felt obviously slighted by John when Sherlock went to great lengths to introduce him as his friend and he corrected him….

Now, don’t get me wrong, I know that you don’t have to trust someone to sleep with them. Thats not my point, I just am not sure Sherlock is the type of man that would…

Also, there’s the is he or isn’t a virgin debate.

Heres where I stand:

- If he has had sex, it probably wasn’t the best experience or he regretted it later. (perhaps it was someone he mistakenly thought he could trust or couldn’t)

-He may not have been sober… perhaps he exchanged sex for drugs at some point when he needed a fix and couldn’t pickpocket enough money

-He finds it a distraction and the more he has, the more it’ll distract so, having as little as possible and fulfilling these urges with masterbation instead of involving another person is always preferable.

But, yes, it is bothering me a bit. It feels so silly, not being able to sleep because of the thoughts I’m having about a fictional characters sex life, but it is really bothering me.

Moffat has said something along the lines of not being able to ask Sherlock whether or not he was a virgin and Benedict seems to think he probably had sex with Irene… well, then why not Janine as well?

Again, I think it all comes down to trust with Sherlock when dealing with interpersonal relationships, so, I’m very curious to talk to others about this.The upside is IF he did have sex with Irene, than he definitely had sex with Molly (unless she turned him down) because he’s told us he trusts her and needed her for something pertaining to faking his death.

Does anyone out there agree with me on my thoughts or have more to add?

emmyjeanb:

I enjoyed reading your analysis. BUT, I’m going to have to go against the curve. Here’s my analysis, for what it’s worth:

I think that if he’d never had sex, then it would be indicative that he has some sort of hangup about sex itself. Based on things show people have said about Sherlock’s sexuality and why he is the way he is, I’m more inclined to think that celibacy is a personal choice that he didn’t always make. Part of the whole ‘the body is transport’ thing. He has eaten rich meals, had good nights sleep and had sex before…he’s just mostly cut them out as 'bad for brainwork’. My impression is that this started post-drugs and before that, he didn’t impose these strict rules on himself. Not to say it’s a religious conviction either…every once in awhile, he partakes in each, or at least thinks of doing so. Of the three, sex is the one that’s the most troublesome to come by, so it’s definitely a 'once in a blue moon’ thing.

I think that Irene was one of those times, the first woman in a long while to attract him to the point that he decided to press pause on his monk-like existence. I don’t see Irene and Sherlock’s relationship as love, more like a strong mutual attraction/admiration (their interactions were very sexually charged). They dueled, flirted, he saved her life and it culminated in consummating their attraction, at which point they both went on their merry way. I doubt either of them regrets it at all, in fact I think it’s probably a source of some very fond, tingly memories (hence Irene’s cameo in Sherlock’s mind in The Sign of Three) but not something either of them pine after in an emotional sense.

He didn’t sleep with Janine, per say. Even if he were inclined to deny it out of some sort of shame or pride, it was Janine herself who said she wished she’d gotten at least one shot at it. I’ve heard people come up with ways to read what she said in a different way that changes the meaning, but I personally think any other reading is a stretch. Although I do think it’s obvious there was some stuff going on - she slept in his bed and had no problem getting in the bathtub with him. Maybe even some non-penetrative stuff, which I guess could be called sex, depending on your classification. Janine seemed to think she was ripped off in that sense, though, so there’s that.

As for Molly - that relationship is the most complicated, in my opinion. Basically, I don’t think Molly and Sherlock’s relationship is sexual. I think you’re right in that trust is huge for Sherlock, which puts Molly on a different level than either of the other two because he doesn’t/didn’t trust Janine or Irene. Molly isn’t someone he could have 'fun’ with without lasting emotional impact/consequences, and he would never use her in that way at this point. The tone of their most recent interactions is tinged with a kind of fondness, gravity and a respectful deference that is unique to Sherlock’s interactions on the show, IMO. Something’s simmering there that hints very vaguely (tantalizingly, to me) of romantic yearnings on both sides, but it’s not exactly sexual. Yet. Of all three, Molly is the least likely person to have had sex with him, because it would never be 'just’ sex. She’s the one with whom he shares the deepest emotional connection by far.

[...]

sherlollymouse:

I don’t think you went against the curve at all… in fact I agree with you about having sex with Molly being more than sex.

I’m just trying to make sense of the obvious reactions he has when sex is brought up.

I’m inclined to think he doesn’t have the fondest memories because Janine was right, it wasn’t just discomfort, there was a bit of fear… as if those comments made her seem predatory to him.

Irene just boggles my mind… because I genuinely do think they were attracted to each other, but I still think trust is paramount to him BECAUSE he doesn’t have sex that often.

I dunno…like I said, it wouldn’t surprise me either way, I just wouldn’t get it because of the things I mentioned.

justanotherfangirls:

I do think that Benedict and Moffat heavily implied that Sherlock and Irene had sex in Karachi, so I had found it a bit inconsistent that the Irene in his mind palace had the hairstyle she had when he saw her naked the first time they met. I would have expected her with her hair down like what we saw of her in Karachi, because surely that memory would be fonder than when he met her for the first time. Unless she fixed her hair like that after Sherlock saved her life, I am inclined to believe that’s the only time they confirmed that he saw her naked. And he had memorized how she looked because he is attracted to her. I mean, I’m a straight girl but I’m attracted to her. Also his porn preference is basically “normal” in canon, whatever that means it is not the dominatrix wild kinky thing I would associate with sex with Irene. They left it open like that so viewers would think what they want, I mean you could believe that they did, but you could also believe that they didn’t. Much like what they implied with him having sex with Molly as I have previously written in another post. You could believe that they did, or you could believe that they did not.

poetattemptsfiction:

Interesting. I don’t think that he slept with Irene or Molly. I don’t think he’s a virgin, but I think he likely stopped having sex once he became a detective and was off drugs (I’m assuming here the two coincided as he alluded to the fact that he solves crimes to stay clean in His Last Vow). I think he’s stubborn, and he’s convinced that sexual intimacy would interfere with his work, so he’s celibate. Dunno, though. He could be a total slut and has had sex with the lot of them.

waitingforthemaninthebluebox:

I think it’s highly unlikely (even if his asshole does clench up at the mention of it) that at 35 or whatever age Sherlock is supposed to be that he is a virgin. I think your theory about bad experiences/trust issues is pretty solid. I know people that HAVE had sex but still don’t like to talk about or have other people talk about it. As for not having sex with Janine some girls like Janine (confident, successful and sexually confident as well) would probably get frustrated being in a relationship for a month and not having had sex or discussion about it.

[...]

If it does turn out to be revealed that he’s a virgin I dunno it makes me feel a little weird. Like I was a late bloomer but damn in your 30's? He must have had sex.

Janine does not know who Sherlock really is, but Molly does

 (Sherlock meta by iamazonian)

She kept saying that she’s the only one who knows who Sherlock really is (in 221B), or that she at least knows who Sherlock is (in the hospital, where she didn’t say “only one” but still carried that implication in her tone).

Excuse me, dear Janine, but you didn’t even know that your whole relationship with “Sherl” was a scam.

You can use the whole “blinded by sentiment” excuse, alright, but that just means that for the entirety of your acquaintance, you were blinded by sentiment and thus everything you know about him is not only sugar-coated but downright wrong. It was falsified, and you didn’t know. The version of ‘him’ that you know is not what he is. It’s so ridiculously simple.

If for your whole life, your brain has been registering salt as sugar because of some sort of malfunction in your taste buds, you cannot claim to know what salt is or what something being salty means when the time comes that your taste buds are corrected.

And for you to tell him that you’re the only one who knows who he is in front of his best friend, well you’re just downright flipping delusional.

Also, it’s funny, because I could’ve sworn someone was shown to be quite… experienced in the matter of seeing the real Sherlock even when he’s actively trying to hide what he’s feeling.

And that someone didn’t even think she counted.

I see the strength of Molly Hooper shine through even though she wasn’t in any Janine scenes in this episode. Because she possesses the gift of knowing who Sherlock Holmes is, through a combination of knowing him for years and working with him on a regular basis and loving him without expecting that he’ll love her back and being his friend who’d suffer through insults and deductions to help him without any sort of payment and basically just being there for him through the bad and the worse and the worst of times.

Because she doesn’t put herself on a pedestal even after Sherlock Holmes literally told her that she mattered the most.

Because even through everything she’s done for him, and everything that she can see in him that no one else can’t, she still doesn’t claim that she’s the one who knows Sherlock the most. Which, with the exception of Mycroft, may just prove to be true.

And I’m sorry, but I just can’t let that hospital scene go: You know that he’s not what you thought he was, and still you claim to know him? Who he really is?

And claim that you would have been friends, right after you’ve spread lies and rumors about him? I mean yes, he was a downright arsehole and he did 100% deserve that, but how do you show genuine friendship after you make money off of lies you’ve fabricated about a person?

I’m sorry again, but I happen to remember that a certain pathologist to whom he’s shown some of worst arseholery to, and over a prolonged period of time as well, puts him in his place without making a profit out of him. And still offers herself (“You can have me.”) even though she really believed he doesn’t consider her as a friend.

Forgive me if these are shipper goggles talking, or just probably common sense, but that’s what friendship and love (whether platonic or romantic) is. At least, to me.

Not freaking asking someone on his hospital bed why he didn’t initiate/encourage sex at least once with her before he broke it off.

No, darling, you weren’t disappointed that you didn’t become Sherlock’s friend. You were disappointed because you didn’t manage to get his dangly bits into you. You were disappointed because the illusion of a fairytale whirlwind romance was brought to a stop, and your belief that you were the person who’s conquered Sherlock Holmes’ mind and heart was shattered. It was your ego that was bruised. And that’s what you’re annoyed about.

Janine, reconsidered 

 (Sherlock Meta by mild-lunacy)

I was rewatching HLV in preparation for The Reckoning (aka Series 4), and I noticed something off about the Janine scene at Baker Street. As we know, Sherlock was acting weird, but then, he was *acting*. People have various explanations of how/why Janine was acting weird. Most people point to her willingness to forgo sex with Sherlock as the odd thing, or alternatively her willingness to believe he was really proposing. The usual point is, how could a savvy, smart woman go for that?

Well, that’s what I’d call an example of an ‘argument from real life’, which is almost always a dead end when analyzing genre fiction. I realize it’s really, really popular for a reason, and that is that it comes really naturally and is part of how most people process and relate to stories. That being said, I’m inclined to dismiss it. If you think these points suggest Janine isn’t believable or coherent as a character, fine. That simply means you’re not satisfied with the show, but that’s not offering a useful critique for further analysis. Nor is it a good reason to go against explicit canon and insist she did have oral sex with Sherlock at least. Anyway, the oddness in Janine that I’m speaking of is the stuff John canonically found weird himself, based on his scandalized, weirded out look: coming out without her bottoms, calling Mycroft ‘Mike’ and blatantly helping herself (staking a claim) in the kitchen. In other words, she was both forward and rude, in context: not acting very British. Then she was super-demonstrative, sitting in Sherlock’s lap later; people have theorized that this is because she knows about Sherlock’s plans, but there’s a simpler explanation. One that doesn’t require breaking a plot point in HLV (always important).

Janine’s inappropriate behavior fits if she was actually *trying* to make John uncomfortable, hoping to rub it in with her new relationship to Sherlock. Not to help Sherlock for whatever reason, but because *she* was jealous. Remember, she knows how important John is to Sherlock because of their conversation at the wedding. Sherlock made his fixation on John clear by his behavior there, and in fact Sherlock rejected her at the time (both sexually and as a candidate for the position John’s marriage represented an end to). The walking around half-dressed makes sense if you essentially want your lover’s ex to suffer. It really is that simple sometimes, and it also makes sense as a mirror with Mary’s dynamic with Sherlock and John in HLV, as well. Mary was starting to resent Sherlock’s role in John’s life as well, sniping at him earlier in the episode about some people not having heard of Sherlock.

The whole performance being directed at discomfiting John becomes truly obvious when she tells Sherlock right in front of John, “I’m the only one who really knows what you’re like, remember?”

That’s just *blatantly* a reference to John as well as John’s (presumably former) role in Sherlock’s life. It’s the sort of thing you don’t say in front of someone’s questionably-ex 'partner’ if you don’t have to, or you’re being friendly. If you’re not trying to score emotional points, you don’t say that sort of thing even to 'play along’ (assuming she’s doing that, rather than Sherlock, which I think is the actual reality of the situation). We know that Janine is canonically nasty and vengeful (from her going to the newspapers about her sex life with Sherlock), so this behavior is totally understandable. Further, if she was taunting John right then, it makes sense she’d been in that mode the entire time.

Not to say that this is somehow an anti-Janine post, but I’m guessing that one reason fandom hasn’t really talked about this before is that it’s not particularly flattering to Janine. We tend to be a bit protective about female characters in the show. In Series 3, however, every female character– Molly, Janine, Mary, even Mrs Hudson– repeatedly acted somewhat insensitively, and everyone except maybe Mrs Hudson was also manipulative and even emotionally abusive to various degrees. With Molly, I’m referring to the contentious yelling episode at the lab, and with Mrs Hudson, I’m mainly referring to the multiple times in TSoT where she mysteriously stomped over Sherlock’s apparent anxiety about John’s impending nuptials. Mary, on the other hand, exemplified every single aspect of this sort of insensitive, manipulative behavior throughout the Series, of course.

The other reason I haven’t seen anyone mention this interpretation before in the Johnlocker circles I travel in is probably because it treats Janine’s canonical heterosexual/heteroromantic feelings seriously. There’s not much I can say about that except that it’s my best judgment that they were indeed real.

What we learn in the conversation with Janine in the hospital

 (Sherlock Meta by sylviatietjens)

Anonymous asked: Hey! IMO your blog is the best for johnlock discussion so I wanted to ask what you thought of the hospital convo between Jeanine and Sherlock! In that moment I came to realise that I think he's in fact gay and he realises it himself. I mean they talk about 'waiting til marriage' and she tells him he's 'that kind of guy' (she could only mean one thing loll) then mentions John! SH doesn't say anything of course but to me he's literally screaming it with his eyes! His expressions say it all if you ask me.

sylviatietjens:

Hello!

I think it’s very possible to take a reading that Sherlock is gay from the conversation in Janine in hospital. He looks visibly uncomfortable when she says “Just once would’ve been nice,” and of course then says “I was waiting until we got married,” to which she replied “That was never going to happen,” which is of course true - when asked by John what he was going to do after marrying Janine, Sherlock said he obviously didn’t plan to marry her. So he’d been avoiding sex with a beautiful woman - and he himself claimed to be “unaware of the beautiful” while looking at her, implying that he is aware that she is beautiful, yet isn’t attracted to her - even going as far as telling her that he “works nights” so that he can visit the drug den and further avoid having to sleep with her. Having a bath while John was in the flat was helpful, too - they’re British, there’s no way she’d initiate sex with him while someone else was in the flat.

Yet Steven Moffat has said that he’s not asexual and “has a past” and Benedict Cumberbatch has said that he “has a sexuality” (notice the ambiguous phrasing), and Mark Gatiss has claimed that he was not attracted to Irene other than intellectually and that “it doesn’t have to be something as mundane as a love story” (not that love and sex are synonymous, but I believe Sherlock to be neither bisexual nor biromantic) so why avoid sex with a woman he knows is beautiful in the knowledge that it would aid his plan unless his attractions lay elsewhere?

There’s also the fact that Sherlock has always been more perceptive to the attention of men than of women. In the beginning of A Study in Pink, Molly is quite obviously asking him out, yet he’s totally ignorant of that fact. He’s also ignorant of the obvious fact that her Christmas gift was for him, bemused by Irene and her overt sexuality (she flirts “at him, he never replies,” despite John insisting that “Sherlock always replies to everything" [he notably doesn’t reply to people presuming they’re a couple]), and shocked when, at the wedding, Janine says “But no sex, okay?” Yet he immediately presumes that John is asking him out in Angelo’s, immediately picks up on ‘Jim from IT’ being gay and interested in him, and doesn’t appear to be bemused by Moriarty’s overt sexuality (“Hello, sexy,”/”The flirting’s over, Sherlock, Daddy’s had enough now,”/”Daddy loves me the best!”/”They all want me. Suddenly, I’m Mr Sex,”/”You have to admit that’s sexier.”). Janine even said it herself: “I wish you weren’t… Whatever it is you are.” (“I know.”) ‘Whatever he is’ isn’t asexual - the writers and cast confirmed that. It isn’t ‘incapable of forming meaningful relationships’, either - just look at his best man’s speech.

[To clear up some confusion, I’d like to note that I didn’t mean that Janine was implying that Sherlock’s gay and just using weird phrasing, I meant that the writers were implying that Sherlock’s gay by having her presume that their relationship wouldn’t work out, and discounting two of the most obvious reasons why that might not be so, the third being homosexuality.]

Sherlock is also much more ‘stereotypically gay’ in series 3 than in series 1 or 2 - he is more flamboyant, more fashion-conscious, he loves dancing (which is a strongly allied with homosexuality in The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, aka Mark Gatiss’ favourite film and one of the key influences on the writers) and appears to be using an increasing about of product in his hair, something which he himself equated with homosexuality in The Great Game. I ought to clarify here that I don’t think that these things can be taken as reliably indivative of sexuality in reality, but within a fictional narrative in which stereotypes and associations are utilised to make suggestions about a topic that is not discussed, they’re certainly notable.

Do I even have to mention ‘Happily Ever After’?

Food for thought, isn’t it?

How Janine and Sherlock started their "relationship"

 (Sherlock Meta by Ivy Blossom)

Anonymous asked:

Hi! Love your thoughtful meta. One topic I haven't seen addressed much is Janine's relationship with Sherlock during their month's "relationship." Given that the FIRST thing we learn about her is that she's openly sexual and willing - what would compel her to stay with Sherlock when clearly she wasn't getting what she defines as "sex". Wouldn't they have had that awkward convo earlier? And I think there's a chance Sherlock couldn't perform even if he wanted, if he's truly gay and not bi.

Ivy Blossom:

Oh I’m 100% sure they had that conversation. In fact I bet it was the first conversation they had, or one of the first. Picture it: girl meets lonely, sad gay boy at a wedding. She is single, she digs him, but he’s obviously gay. After the wedding he calls her. Can they meet up? He wants to talk.

He explains that he’s never been in a relationship before. There’s something special about her. He feels really connected to her, like she really gets him and still likes him. Most people hate him instantly when they see how he is, how his brain works, how blunt and frankly rude he is, but she seems to really like the things about him that other people hate. And he’s really surprised by that. It’s a new experience for him and he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it. He doesn’t want it to stop.

He tells her that he’s very lonely, and that he always has been, but only recently realized it. Because of her. Because she was there, and then she wasn’t. And he felt her absence, and it hurt.

He’s got a lot of issues, you know, with intimacy. It’s not just the childhood bullying, but that’s a lot of it. He’s different, he’s not like other boys, and he has a very low self-esteem, for one. He doesn’t think he’s a loveable person. He never expected to find anyone who would be able to like him as he actually is. He’s still struggling to believe it’s possible. And he will continue to struggle to believe it, even if she tries to show him she really does like him. Sometimes he’ll think she’s just misunderstood, and at some point she’ll see the real him and she’ll leave him. As he says: he has intimacy issues.

Oh yes, he’d like to have a physical relationship. With her. He’d love to! But he’s very nervous about it, he’s scared of it, it will take time. He’s not sure what he’s doing in that department, or what he wants, or likes, it’s a big mess. He’s ignored that part of himself for so long, he feels like it’s a foreign country. It will take time for him to feel entirely comfortable. Lots of time. Is that okay? He wants to do this, but he wants to do it right. He’s afraid, if they move too fast, that he’ll shut down and lash out at her and destroy everything. Will she take it slowly with him? Not put any pressure on him? He knows it’s weird, he’s sorry, but he’s doing his best. He is, actually, quite desperate for physical affection. He loves it when she touches him. He loves feeling like someone she would want to touch.

He wouldn’t even consider this with anyone but her. She’s the first person who made him think about it at all. She gets him. She knows what he’s like.

So, does she want to give it a shot? Would she try? He’ll do his best to be good to her.

What I love best about this is that it’s all true. It’s just that it’s about John, not Janine.

Janine and Sherlock: A relationship without sex

 (Sherlock Meta by Ivy Blossom)

Anonymous asked:

Hello I have read your meta about Sherlock discussing sex with Janine. What do you think happened in the bathroom then? they were both apparently (almost) naked, laughing, they were probably making out and Sherlock had to pretend he's really into it because John was listening. Also we know from setlock photos there was a scene with sherlock's bathtub (i'm not going to speculate why they cut it out).

Ivy Blossom:

Well this is easy. What happened in the bathroom was washing, not sex. Strangely enough, you can be naked in a bathtub with someone, and touch them with a lot of affection, and still not be actively engaged in anything either participant would label as sex.

On first watch, I absolutely assumed Sherlock had had sex with Janine. For a case, of course, but still. I was surprised when Janine complained about the lack of sex between them. What I wrote here is what I figured he must have said to her to make her feel and act like she was in a relationship that was sexual without it actually being sexual.

Sex isn’t just penetration, and I am not presuming that that’s all that Janine means (though it’s possible that she does, we don’t see it, so think as you will, obviously). If you read that post and thought I was talking about penetrative sex, that’s an assumption in your head, not mine. I think Janine touches Sherlock frequently and affectionately in the hopes of helping him feel comfortable enough to have sex with her in all the ways that can mean. Because that is something she clearly wants, and I think he would have had to tell her that it’s something he wants too, or she wouldn’t behave the way she does.