Let’s talk a little about “I Love You.” 

 (Sherlock meta by sherlocklian and the-deplorable-707)

sherlocklian:

First off, I’m talking from a point of view of writing and storytelling. I’m no expert, but there is logic that goes into writing scenes and arcs and setting up and paying off various things. Scenes are finely tuned machines. Decisions have been made. Words were put down in a deliberate order to create a specific effect.

So. The show introduces a concept in the “I love you” scene:

It’s hard to say “I love you” when you actually mean it. 

What I mean is, this is presented as a truth within the show, within the scene. It doesn’t really matter if it’s true in real life, or true all the time. Within the context of the show, and this scene, we are presented with a truth:

It’s hard to say “I love you” when you actually mean it. 

Note that this also implies:

It’s not hard to say “I love you” if you don’t really mean it. 

So, based on that, why would Sherlock struggle to tell Molly he loves her?

Because he means it. 

Think about it logically:

Is Molly his friend? Yes she is. He says so.

Does he love his friends? Yes he does. He’s said so before, in John’s best man’s speech.

Has he had a female friend before? Yes he has, in Mary. He loved her, too.

Would he have struggled telling these people he loved them? No, I don’t believe so. We saw him do it publicly at the wedding. Forgive my memory but I think he may say it about Mary during series 4, too.

Why, then, is it so hard for Sherlock to tell Molly, “I love you” ? 

Is it because he knows she loves him romantically and he doesn’t want to give her false hope? Maybe. But isn’t it more important to save her life? Can’t he just ask for forgiveness later, explain things to her? She’s reasonable. He’s been cruel to her before, for no reason. He has the best possible reason to be cruel to her now, if it will save her. Not to mention, “Will caring about them save them? Then I’ll continue not to make that mistake.” (I know, he’s had character growth, he’s not that cold now. Except… he was, just 5 minutes ago, in every previous room Eurus had set up for him.)

Is he afraid he’ll lose a very good friend if he tells her “I love you” and it’s a lie and she never forgives him? Sure. Is it mean to make her say it to him when he at first has no intention of saying it back? Sure. (Although, none of this is really his choice, either; he’s not just fucking with her.)

But I want to remind you again:

It’s hard to say “I love you” when you actually mean it. 

It was hard for Sherlock to say “I love you” because he actually meant it.

What’s more, we were told in the previous episode that Molly Hooper is the only one who can see through Sherlock’s bullshit. We were told this by John, generally considered to be the voice of reason. We were told in the last episode that she wasn’t important, even though we as viewers know she’s the one who “mattered the most,” the one who apparently can’t solve crimes with Sherlock when she’s engaged (which makes no sense if it’s a platonic friendship).

So, Molly can see through Sherlock’s bullshit, and she won’t say “I love you” to him until he says it to her first, and says it like he means it.

But she did say it back to him. Because he said it like he meant it. And it was hard for him to say it, because it’s hard to say it if you mean it. 

The first time he said it, he was just trying it out. He’d never said it before. And he didn’t need to say it again. But he did. He said it again. And that time, he meant it.

We all thought in the trailer it looked like he’d had a revelation when he said it. Well, he did. He realized what he feels for her is love. And it must, in some way, be different from the love he feels for his friends, or else he wouldn’t have had so much trouble saying it.

Just my two cents.

the-deplorable-707:

I agree with all of this except just one little thing. I don’t think he struggled saying it because he thought she would believe him, because she’s the one who’s telling him TO say it. She told him to say it “like” he means it, implying that she doesn’t think he DOES. So, Sherlock struggling to say it, can’t be that. And I mean, he knows that if he doesn’t say it, she won’t, and Euros will kill her. So, why wouldn’t Sherlock just say it immediately? It’s so weird to see him struggle to get it out, knowing this. I think it’s because of what you said, it’s exactly the same reason Molly didn’t want to say it: because he means it. That second 'I love you' was as genuine as you can get. Sherlock is in love with Molly Hooper and his body language, the tone of his voice, that look of wonder in his eyes says everything we need to know.

sherlocklian:

Well, the reason I brought that up is because I saw a few other theories and I was trying to list them for completion’s sake, but I was in a hurry and I screwed up and didn’t actually write them all out! I also didn’t want to get too off topic.

But the specific thing you’re referring to, the reason I brought it up was because I’ve seen a theory which suggested that Molly already mostly KNEW he loved her, and that her telling him to say it like he means it, is her forcing him to admit what she already knows to be true. I consider this an interesting but unlikely theory.

But the vagueness of their relationship, and all the empty gaps in our knowledge allows us to imagine all sorts of things, which the show doesn’t prove OR disprove. (Though of course some theories are more plausible than others.)

Additionally, if we choose to think Molly’s “bad day” was because she was pregnant with Sherlock’s child, another theory I’ve heard [...], then having Molly force Sherlock to admit he loves her makes a lot more sense. On the other hand, there’s not any actual proof they’ve ever slept together! Unless you think that’s why her flat was one of his bolt holes.

For the record, I don’t like to assume too much is happening offscreen… I like to have proof. So I didn’t mention this stuff in my post, because it implies that Sherlock and Molly would be having sex before he knew he loved her, and that’s not my favorite kind of thing. But obviously, people do that in real life. So I suppose it’s not impossible.

[...]